Ask Gwen: Fiance gets so angry

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broken heartMy fiance gets so angry with me when I make small mistakes. He says he’s just not used to other people making mistakes. He says sorry, but it happens at least once a week. For instance, today I mailed a parcel to the wrong address because I mixed up the numbers in the address. I got on fixing it right away but he just sat there disgusted and said “why can’t you do anything right?” I don’t know what to do, no one is perfect, how do I get through this?

Gwen’s Answer:

I see two problems here. One is that he does not have tolerance for human error. Everyone makes mistakes. The second problem is that he gets angry when you do make a mistake. He is acting like a parent who is chastising a child. I think it is very important that you both go for counseling before you get married as this could be a serious problem. If he will not go, you go by yourself. If he is angry and critical now, that will only get worse as time goes on, unless he learns to do it differently. Also, if you are planning to have children, you must ask yourself if this man has the patience to be a supportive and loving parent. I do think this is a serious issue, so do not imagine it will get better by itself, or will magically disappear after the wedding.

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