“You were born an original. Don’t die a copy.” ~John Mason
Many teens struggle with the issue of friends and fitting in socially. Adolescence it a challenging time, and it all can be quite confusing. It is a time of great insecurity, and teens do not make it easy for each other.
Teens can be very judgmental, forming themselves into tight homogenous groups, rejecting those who are not like them. Consequently those who are in the groups continue to mirror each other, often subverting aspects of themselves they feel would not be accepted.
Those not in a group may strive to be like group members so that they might eventually work their way in. They may be even more self-conscious than the group members, intuitively feeling they are being judged because they are different. It is not easy.
It is important to remember that the teen years are only a small part of life, and once older; people are more inclined to accept others for who they are. Still, it can be lonely, and hard on the self-esteem to feel different.
It is also wise to consider that “different” can be a good thing. Conforming, becoming one of the crowd and losing one’s individuality is not so good. When this happens we lose touch with ourselves, can become depressed, and reach adulthood not having the foggiest idea of who we are.
My advice to everyone, but especially young people, is to be yourself. Loving and accepting your uniqueness just because you are rare and precious- being the only one of you to every exist-makes more sense than evaluating yourself in comparison to others. This is especially so when comparing oneself to others who are not being themselves , but rather are conforming to some superficial standards.
By being yourself and letting your own unique light shine, you can attract those who like you for who you really are. You may not have tons of friends, but a few that are real, genuine and sincere are worth more than lots of “acquaintances.”
You have one life to live, and you are the constant in your life. Learn to accept and enjoy who you are when you are young, and the rest of your life will be much more fulfilling.
Copyright © Gwen Randall-Young, All Rights Reserved. Contact us if you would like permission to reprint.
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Thinking for Yourself (Empowerment for Youth)