Controlling Our Own Negative Behaviour

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“If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow.” ~Chinese Proverb

frustrationDo you ever have times when you realize you do not like the way you are talking to another? Perhaps you are angry or frustrated, and even as the words are coming out of your mouth you know they are not reflective of the person you want to be. Having this awareness means at least that you are conscious, and that your higher self is speaking to you.

It is tempting to blame the other person, for if they would only behave differently you would not have to act like this. Wrong! Our integrity is solely our responsibility, regardless of what another says or does. Of course we should know that, because it is what we always tell our children.

Certainly it can be challenging to remain in integrity while someone is hurling insults or testing our patience beyond belief. However, that is when it matters most, because that is when we are most tempted to abandon our values and standards. Think about it-its easy for our teens to stay away from drugs and alcohol or sex when there is no opportunity to indulge. It is when they are tempted that their character is truly tested.

If you want to change your behavior to bring it more into alignment with the person you wish to be, then you must make a commitment to yourself. This is just between you and yourself. If, for example, you do not want to yell anymore, promise yourself that whatever happens, you will not raise your voice. Of course you will be tempted, and at first it may be hard to control yourself, but it will get easier with time. Remind yourself that the one who is irritating you is your teacher, helping you to learn patience. (Click here for information on obtaining my Releasing Anger CD)

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